The Keys to Happiness, Part 3
Creating Inner Happiness
NOTABLE QUOTABLE
Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but the
realization of what you have.
Anonymous
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Pure Bliss
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It has been mentioned that the Human Givens model is simply a restatement of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. While I agree that the Hierarchy of Needs provided a wonderful base for the Human Givens model, what becomes significant about the list of Human Givens is the idea that when these needs are not satisfied and in balance, we begin to experience specific signs of emotional distress.
Remember that we are organisms hard-wired to seek pleasure and avoid pain. Do these two primal drives ever collide? All the time. We want to eat comfort food but we want to be slender and fit, socially acceptable. We want to rev up our adrenline with risky behavior but…what’s not against the law is probably dangerous. We want to play video and internet games from sunrise to sundown but the bills need to be paid or we will be scuffling for food and shelter. And so it goes.
It has been suggested that one of the primary hallmarks of maturity is the ability to delay gratification. That seems reasonable to me but what about when those primary needs for love, affection, resonable health, exercise, creative expression, fun, interaction with others, some sense of security (or perhaps, at least, predictability), some sense of belonging to a community, having some purpose, having value to self and others are left wanting for too long.
When we start having those vague feelings of not-ok-ness, vague aches and pains that have no real source, the drive to distract ourselves with anything that takes our attention away from our feelings, then it’s time to take a look at the checklist. Take our emotional pulses, so to speak. What ideas haunt us and bug us: if I only had time/money/energy/another person to do XXX with, life would be better?
What do you daydream about? What is your life on hold for, waiting for the perfect time when everything else is completed? What are the seemingly little things that you find yourself resenting or hungering for?
These are the type of messages our “emotional selves” send us. If we don’t listen, we begin to decompensate, fall apart, cease to function effectively.
Learn to take your emotional pulse. Learn to ask your self “what do I really want out of life?” or “what’s missing?” or “what do I daydream about?” or “what am I waiting for the perfect time to engage in?” The answers will come and you will find your life in better balance.
Simple but important. Simple but not necessarily easy. But then, it is YOUR LIFE we’re talking about.
There are many things we can figure out for ourselves but if you are finding that you’re having trouble, hypnotherapy can help.
Here’s to your success,
Susan French
http://www.hypno4success.com
877-583-2026
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