“The greater the power, the more dangerous the abuse.”
– Edmund Burke
If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, you know how difficult it is to escape. There can be many reasons why someone may choose not to leave an abusive relationship, such as children, fear, lack of resources, and even love.
While staying with an abusive partner may seem like the right thing to do sometimes, it is not the only choice. There are a number of ways you can get out of an abusive relationship and break the cycle of domestic violence.
Here are a few ways you can help empower yourself to survive.
- Acknowledge the abuse. Victims have a tendency to minimize the abuse they are experiencing. This is especially true for those suffering from emotional abuse. In addition to physical violence, intimidation, name calling and threats are all considered to be different forms of abuse. If you find yourself walking on eggshells in an attempt to keep your partner from exploding, this is a good indication you are in an abusive relationship. Once you recognize this fact, you will be one step closer to getting yourself out.
- They can’t be changed. As much as you might want to, you are not able to change or save your abuser. The most powerful way you can speak to your abuser is by leaving. By staying, you are only encouraging them to continue the cycle of abuse.
- Ask for help. There are a number of different organizations available to men and women who are suffering from domestic violence. While your friends and family can be amazing sources of support, sometimes you need a professional to assist you. One resource you can utilize is the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. They can provide you with access to shelters, therapy and even legal advice. Remember, you are not alone.
- Be computer-savvy. If you visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline website, you will notice they give a warning that indicates your computer may be monitored. As such, they advise victims to use a safe computer that is not accessible by your abuser. If you need help making a safety plan, this organization can help.
- Ask why. If you are a victim of abuse it is important to determine the underlying issues that led you to being in this kind of relationship. Do you have low self-esteem? Do you feel as if you don’t deserve any better? Are you addicted to being in relationships? By staying in an abusive relationship this only decreases your feelings of self-worth. Once you are able to acknowledge the reason for being in this position, you are then able to start breaking the cycle.
Don’t wait for things to get as bad as they possibly can before you decide to leave. It can turn deadly in an instant, especially when there are drugs or alcohol involved. While you may still love your partner, or believe you love your partner, you deserve better and you can survive.
Most of the time, the abused partner is "in love" with what they thought the abuser was and live in the delusion that the "abuser" will stop in time. Never true. Abuse always escalates unless the abuser gets major help to change. Do not wait until you're dead!
Get the support you need to make important life changes. If you would like to complement your therapy with an alternative treatment option (or need a place to start), you might consider trying hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy can help you sort out your feelings and give you the courage and strength you need to move on with your life, set new goals, and rebuild an always damaged self-esteem
I would love to chat with you to discuss your treatment options and work with you to help you see your true potential. Book a free consultation below. No pressure. No upsell.