"The silent killer of all great men and women of achievement - particularly men, I don't know why, maybe it's the testosterone - I think it's narcissism. Even more than hubris. And for women, too. Narcissism is the killer."
– James Woods
Is a narcissist causing trouble in your life? Depending on the circumstance, you may be able to distance yourself from this individual, avoiding his or her negative energy altogether. But this isn't always an option, as some people are forced to talk or otherwise communicate with narcissists on a regular basis. So, what's the best way to handle a narcissist if you are unable to avoid him or her?
Which Type of Narcissist are You Dealing with?
First and foremost, you need to identify the type of narcissist you are dealing with. Research has found two primary narcissistic types:
- Vulnerable narcissist -- a person who's self-centered/absorbed, but with a weak inner core.
- Grandoise -- overly cocky and selfish; they believe they are better than everyone else.
Being that vulnerable narcissists are less confident than their grandoise counterpart, it's best to take a passive route when dealing with them. Avoid harsh language that could otherwise fuel the narcissist's behavior, and instead remain quiet and confident in your own abilities. The folks at Psychology Today even say that grandoise narcissists can be used as a positive member of a working team or group, assuming you can "get that person on board" with your ideas.
Focus on Your Own Personal Growth and Development
Rather than exhausting all of your time and energy towards dealing directly with the narcissist, focus on your own personal growth and development. Narcissists feed on other people's fear, using this is a source of energy to power their negative emotions and narcissistic tendencies. Being happy with your own body and mind, however, will allow you to avoid this tactic. You won't fear the narcissist's behavior, at which point he or she will take their negative energy elsewhere. Of course, everyone can benefit from personal growth and development, regardless of whether or not you are dealing with a narcissist.
If you were to view the behaviors of ten different narcissists, you would probably notice they all have one thing in common: they target people who are weak and lack confidence. Of course, this should come as little-to-no surprise, as narcissists feed on the fear of others. If you're faced with one or more narcissists in your life, you must develop the necessary inner strength and confidence to repel him or her. Starting your day with affirmations is one effective technique for building confidence. For more tips on how to build confidence, check out our previous blog post here.
Get the support you need to make important life changes. If you would like to complement your therapy with an alternative treatment option (or need a place to start), you might consider trying hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy can help you sort out your feelings and give you the courage and strength you need to move on with your life, set new goals, and rebuild an always damaged self-esteem.
Call for your FREE consultation. No pressure. No obligation. Let me help you understand what this might mean for you. Hypnosis and Life Coaching have helped many. Let it help you.